Monday, November 23, 2009

That Goldman Sachs Xmas Party Menu (in Full)

With the holiday season rapidly approaching, I managed to get my hands on the Goldman Sachs Xmas Party Menu for this year. I'm told it's not final, but this is what they are proposing (note the pretty ballsy choice of venue...)

Goldman Sachs Holiday Fete - 2009 at the Palais Versailles


Finest Golden Chartreuse Elixir

DOM Benedictine

Selection of Trappist 'Biere Belgique'

Chateauneuf du Papes - Balthazars of Domaine du Pegau 2000

Minted-Green Dacquiris Flowing From a Kozlowski-Inspired Ice Sculpture Fountain.

(Holy Water or non-alcoholic beverages available on request)

With Canapes of 'Pigs-in-a-Blanket', 'Devilled-Eggs', Blood Sausage; Godiveau Lyonnais;

* * * * * * *


Shark-Fin Soup


Fish & Loaves (fish is sustainably caught from the banks of Iceland)


"Salade Romanov" of Lobster & Black Truffles Sprinkled With Gold Foil

* * * * * * *

(Served Smorgasbord or "All You Can Eat-Style", to satiate the most unsatiable of appetites)

Roasted Market Goose Entier with "Couilles Brasse" With Scalped Pototoes

Chateaubriand of Milk-FED Beef avec une Sauce Banquiere

Braised Roebucks in a Creme-de-la-Creme Sauce

Banquette-Holding a 'Surf And Turf' with a bonus of sauce fine-blanc

Traditional Stuffed Turkey in a "Sangfroid" sauce

Freshly-Slaughtered Cutest Spring Lamb (Roasted on a Spit) in a Minted Sauce

"Stuffed Sucking Pig Five-Ways" (Chef's Surprise)

* * * * * * *


Cherry-Picked-Bonus Jubilee

Sponge Cake with a Luxurious Creme Anglaise

Grand-Sized Profiterole Balls with a Rich Chocolate Sauce

Gaffes with a Blanc-Fine Syrup

* * * * *


American Sponge-Drops

Bittersweet Karma Cookies


Ritholtz said...


Demetrius said...

Are they economising?

burnside said...

No one but no one does this better.

Could we have something al nero di seppia?

Shairon the Parliamentarian said...

Are they still sacrificing the waiters after the dessert trays?

ahab said...


lol (-:

A. Dawn said...

Will these be enough?

Anonymous said...

I don't believe this is genuine - they did not rent the Hall Of Mirrors.

Anonymous said...

Oh, the puns in this one don't stop!

Here's my guide to the jokes, descending:

Paris? Bull****

Criminal-inspired Ice Sculpture (think vodka and male organs)

Holy Water? Hahahackhackha!

Fish and Loves (Blankfein: 'doing God's work') from sustainable Iceland!

Gold, Bitches! On those black truffles.

All you can eat buffet? Get in line! Seconds only after everyone has had a chance.

Couilles Brasse! Yum, testicles. Scalped Potatoes? A mere typo?

FED banker sauce (Milk-FED...haha)

Sangfroid - cold blood

Chef's Surprise: "It's humans!"

Anonymous said...

Burnside! Amazing! Squid-ink pasta!

Anonymous said...

What no Flash-fried livers in a nyse and demi-SEC sauce?