Wednesday, May 22, 2013
HFM Advertising or How To Take The Management Out of Risk Management
I have advertising in my blood. One of my relatives invented the Coca-Cola's first brand extension. Yet another relation miraculously figured out how to convince housewives to buy boxes of ordinary baking soda and, quite literally, pour them down their drains and flush them down their shiny white toilets. Kerplooosssssshhh. He was paid handsomely for his efforts.
Hedge Fund Management Companies, and their owners, must be salivating at the imminent opportunities advertising will afford their businesses (and please please please will dewey-eyed pseuds use the correct language: 'Hedge Funds' do NOT advertise; 'Hedge Fund Management Companies' are the not-so-altruistic interested parties here).
Traditionally, Managers kept low profiles. They maintained anonymous sounding names, discreet offices, unpretentious business cards and few titles. They rarely gave interviews, to keep their secrets, well.....ummm errrr ....secret. But if you make a billion dollars in a single year, or, less discreetly, do it for several years in a row, it is, it must be said, rather hard to keep you (and your Gulfstream IV and your divorce) out of the limelight.
So as the business of Hedge Fund Management converges with Traditional Asset Management, Hedge Fund Managers must begin the arduous and fickle process of branding, identity, and positioning in what is arguably an increasingly-crowded space. Where does the successful manager start, without taking one's eye off the proverbial investment ball? Not being too mercenary here, I'd suggest you contact Cassandra, who has taken the liberty of conjuring (and be warned, copyrighting) some apt off-the-shelf tag-lines and slogans that capture the bona-fide essence of these truly unique entities that will shortly serve the other 99% of the investing public. (Please feel free to contribute your own in the Comments Section)
"When Everything Is Not Enough"
"Have We Got The Trades For You!!"
"Working To Help You Try And Make it Back"
"Thank God For 'Dead Pet Trusts' "
Henderson (Absolute Return Fund)
"At Henderson, We're Redefining 'Absolute'"
"The Closest [Legal] Thing to Getting The Call Before The First Call"
"Systematically In Front"
"Fighting For Return To The Bitter End"
"We do it OUR way…(And it Works!!)
Campbell & Co
"There are Leaders. And There are Followers. We are Followers."
"All It Takes Is One Big Trade"
"A Piece of Your Own Private Lottery"
Eclectica Asset Mgmt
"It's The Thought That Counts"
"'The Squeaky Bird Gets The Worm"
"We're So Annoyingly Smart…So You Don't Have To Be"
Blue Sky Japan
"We Take The Management Out of Risk-Management"
"No Comments. Just Returns."
"Hedging is for Sissies"
Helping Investors Make a Small Fortune (Out of a Large One)
"Strong Conviction Walks the Line Between Brilliance and Ignominy"
"The Keys To Better Returns"
"Making Trends Your Friends"
"We Are Paid To Be Greedy, And We Do Not Disappoint"
"[A Bit] Smarter Than The Average Bear"