Friday, January 18, 2008

Credit Insurance For 2009 And Beyond...

Credit Guaranty and Insurance solutions for the next decade.....

There are many ways to insure yourself (and perhaps investors) against the potential inability to make good upon interst payments. Luck-'o'-the-Irish is one of them and nothing is more Irish than your very own Leprechuan, reputedly blessed with strange yet wonderful powers. Undoubtedly, as demand them grows, well see some inflation in their remuneration, so better secure your's early!

Another popular and time-honored method employed by generations of entrepreneurs, speculators and insurers alike for "making good" under conditions of uncertainty is religion and prayer. Whether by securing relics or icons, or the construction and decoration of Houses of Worship with prior profits, appealing to more powerful deities could be just the ticket to make sure those interest payments and principal re-payments find their way back to their intended source, and not siphoned off by someone named Mia B. Robbin through a no-doc HELOC or Refi on a vastly overvalued POS 2x4 shitbox abutting I-95.

Be forewarned, even as a kid I was always grossed out by the thought of carrying a bunny's foot for good luck, but, nonetheless, many people seemed to place their faith in it. Undoubtedly there are many-a-hare hobbling around, or hopping upon three, all for some superstitious not to mention desperate folks' attempts to bolster their fortunes. I include it here, without sanctioning it, for the LAST thing I would desire is to incur the wrath of PETA.

Say what you will about Nancy Reagan (I certainly have gotten lots of mileage out of her anorexic astrological ridiculousness), but the idea of abstention must surely be considered as viable option for those feeling some masochistic need to extend loans to those who have a rotten chance of returning what they've borrowed.

However, IF you absolutely MUST partake (and free-will gives the Male Human in a democratic nation lots of latitude), then one of the most prudent insurances against lame-credit extension and subsequent contagion might very-well be this Full Body Prophylactic (available in all sizes). It's thickness might prevent you from making loans that otherwise might go sour, but then, that's the point, isn't it?


But perhaps the BEST insurance is to get some muscle or some quite villainous-looking and acting heavies cut in the mold of.....ummm....say.....Vinny Jones??!? What better insurance can there possibly be than a loan taken in good faith under pain of grievous bodily harm upon non-repayment?

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

Better tell Jim Cramer, he just lost his mind on TV and screamed for a big bailout program for insurance industry. Let's take the risk out of taking risk?

"Cassandra" said...

For Dr. Dean Adell...

Q: A person exhibits symptoms of apparent insanity coupled with violent uncontrllable outbursts of temper punctuated by apparently unstoppable strings of expletives. Is it possible he/she could be a syphilitic with Tourette's syndrome?

A: Indeed Yes! These diseases have a seeming affinity for each other, with Jim Cramer, as a most prominent example. Oh how those spirochetes eat the brain....

woland said...

Bernanky, Sikorsky, Chervontsy

"Cassandra" said...

....similar flash had crossed my mind. It is so rich, it invades ones waking thoughts