Monday, November 23, 2009

That Goldman Sachs Xmas Party Menu (in Full)

With the holiday season rapidly approaching, I managed to get my hands on the Goldman Sachs Xmas Party Menu for this year. I'm told it's not final, but this is what they are proposing (note the pretty ballsy choice of venue...)


Goldman Sachs Holiday Fete - 2009 at the Palais Versailles

APERITIFS & HORS D'OEUVRES

Finest Golden Chartreuse Elixir

DOM Benedictine

Selection of Trappist 'Biere Belgique'

Chateauneuf du Papes - Balthazars of Domaine du Pegau 2000

Minted-Green Dacquiris Flowing From a Kozlowski-Inspired Ice Sculpture Fountain.

(Holy Water or non-alcoholic beverages available on request)

With Canapes of 'Pigs-in-a-Blanket', 'Devilled-Eggs', Blood Sausage; Godiveau Lyonnais;


* * * * * * *


FIRST COURSE


Shark-Fin Soup

or

Fish & Loaves (fish is sustainably caught from the banks of Iceland)

or


"Salade Romanov" of Lobster & Black Truffles Sprinkled With Gold Foil


* * * * * * *

MAIN COURSES
(Served Smorgasbord or "All You Can Eat-Style", to satiate the most unsatiable of appetites)

Roasted Market Goose Entier with "Couilles Brasse" With Scalped Pototoes

Chateaubriand of Milk-FED Beef avec une Sauce Banquiere

Braised Roebucks in a Creme-de-la-Creme Sauce

Banquette-Holding a 'Surf And Turf' with a bonus of sauce fine-blanc

Traditional Stuffed Turkey in a "Sangfroid" sauce

Freshly-Slaughtered Cutest Spring Lamb (Roasted on a Spit) in a Minted Sauce

"Stuffed Sucking Pig Five-Ways" (Chef's Surprise)


* * * * * * *


DESSERT

Cherry-Picked-Bonus Jubilee

Sponge Cake with a Luxurious Creme Anglaise

Grand-Sized Profiterole Balls with a Rich Chocolate Sauce

Gaffes with a Blanc-Fine Syrup


* * * * *


PETITS-FOURS

American Sponge-Drops

Bittersweet Karma Cookies

10 comments:

  1. No one but no one does this better.

    Could we have something al nero di seppia?

    ReplyDelete
  2. Shairon the Parliamentarian10:02 am, November 23, 2009

    Are they still sacrificing the waiters after the dessert trays?

    ReplyDelete
  3. I don't believe this is genuine - they did not rent the Hall Of Mirrors.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Oh, the puns in this one don't stop!

    Here's my guide to the jokes, descending:

    Paris? Bull****

    Criminal-inspired Ice Sculpture (think vodka and male organs)

    Holy Water? Hahahackhackha!

    Fish and Loves (Blankfein: 'doing God's work') from sustainable Iceland!

    Gold, Bitches! On those black truffles.

    All you can eat buffet? Get in line! Seconds only after everyone has had a chance.

    Couilles Brasse! Yum, testicles. Scalped Potatoes? A mere typo?

    FED banker sauce (Milk-FED...haha)

    Sangfroid - cold blood

    Chef's Surprise: "It's humans!"

    ReplyDelete
  5. Burnside! Amazing! Squid-ink pasta!

    ReplyDelete
  6. What no Flash-fried livers in a nyse and demi-SEC sauce?

    ReplyDelete